The Scarlet otter-spotter-hell

The Scarlet otter-spotter-hell

They seek him here, they seek him there

Those wildlife photographers seek him everywhere

Leaving us under the red rage spell
that is Scarlet Otter-spotter-hell

He seems to have meddled with the Barn Owl evolution

Spoiling poor Mrs B’s weekend, with no solution

Having taught them all to hide and seek

not one Barn Owl did she manage to peek

They seek him here, they seek him there

Those wildlife photographers seek him everywhere

If you should see him, please do give a yell!

Otherwise we are left in the red rage that is Scarlet Otter-spotter-hell

With apologies to Scarlet Pimpernel
creator Baroness Emma Orczy

Last weekend it was off to Norfolk with our friends Craig and Mala and our wildlife guide Carl from Wildlife tours and education I can’t praise Carl highly enough for his attention to detail and his efforts to keep his guests satisfied.

His only fault (although that is definitely not the correct word) is his passion for birds. I’m more into mammals myself, although I am rather partial to birds of prey (not that I approve of their life style – based as it is on ripping to shreds anything that gets in their way). They are just so sleek and elegant (certainly more like Mrs B than myself).

Don’t talk to me about owls though.  Not a issue for me but yet another weekend without a sighting for Mrs B. I think Carl's enthusiasm took a bit of a dent with even his wildlife spotting talents failing to produce a specimen for Mrs B. He did mention that once Mrs B was out of sight the missing owls miraculously appeared danced along the skyline like extras pooring across the stage of Gandhi the musical.

I’m sorry to say that the otters, my main hope for viewing at the weekend, went the same way as Mrs B’s owls. Carl mentioned, as soon as we arrived for the tour, that the rise in temperature was not a good thing (Mala would definitely disagree on this, being rather partial to a spot of heat*) as it meant that the thawing of the lakes and rivers would make it harder to spot otters**.

* Seven layered Mala Cake

Ingredients:

Take one Mala on a Norfolk Safari

Take a moderately mild weekend

Keep adding layers until (the record so far is 7)

Mala has at least doubled in circumference

Leave outside for a few minutes at a moderate temperature

Stuff full of snacks

Squeeze back into a pre-heated motor vehicle

Serve more food immediately

Repeat until sun goes down

** I’m no wild life expert*** so I’m guessing that the otters would not be out ice-skating but rather congregating around any open water source, allowing us to target them bathing. Perhaps we could have lured them in by leaving out some soap on a rope, those little posh shampoos from expensive hotels and a rubber ducky…..   

***The hunting of the  Sealuck

While the otters were playing hide and more hide with us, we did manage to see plenty of other animals and birds. Including a Sealuck, which is a very rare animal indeed and which was spotted twice in the same day – being as my sighting was the first ever and it turns out it will also be the last (do the maths….) This semi-mythical character is made up of a seal disguised as the hind part of a duck.

OK, through my disapointment at the lack of otter action I might have got a bit over excited and  thought I had seen our first seal of the weekend. It turned out to be a duck's posterior sticking out of the water........in my defence it was quite a distance away and the visibility was not great.  My delightful companions then spent the next two days making comments like:

“Is that a seal in that tree over there?”

“Gosh is that a low flying seal?”

"Why is that seal quacking?"

Hmm........that will teach me to get over-enthusiastic about wild life…

I had hoped that Carl might have stuck a couple of prize specimens in his freezer overnight, like he did with the moths on our last tour. But apparently otters don’t react very well to being frozen, unlike moths who go into a state of suspended animation and gradually come back to life as they thaw out. Otters have a tendency go into a possum-like state but never come out of it.  Very useful if you want something to wrap around you to keep you warm (Mala step away from the otter, you have more than enough layers on) but not if you want a chance to see them frolicking around the country. Not having seen an otter in the wild, however,  I can only assume they frolick……

The Birds

Inspired by our adventures and Carl, our guide's, enthusiasm for our feathered friends,  Mrs B has purchased a cat feeding station  - sorry I mean bird feeding station (Freudian slip) for the back garden.  I never realised just how expensive a hobby it is to entice birds into your garden……. to feed the cats (don’t worry - our two could not catch a cold).  It also creates a whole industry geared around serving the birds.  Have we learned nothing from Alfred Hitchcock ? (This is some of the worst acting and effects I have ever seen.)

Energy watch
Monitoring our way to a fortune (or not) with our Solar Panels

KW Produced so far - 143
( 9KW for the week)

This has earned us approximately – £60.95 so far

21KW  generated in the week

A record of the week

“You won't see me”  by The Beatles – Covering both the missing otters and Mrs B’s no show owls

"Wings of a Dove" by madness – Ok so we didn’t see any doves but they do have feathers,….doves that is, not Madness

“And Your Bird Can Sing” by the Beatles -  Tell me about it, the robins on our roof at night certainly give it a good go  -"Shut up won’t you we are trying to sleep"   and just think Mrs B is trying to encourage more of the noisy sods around.....

“Crazy” by Seal - Just be thankful I could not find anything by the Otters

Photo finish

This week a complete smorgasbord of wildlife - For the record The Beast, with his new 300mm 2.8F lens (Plus 2x converter making it a 600mm 5.6F lens) and monopod, took more luggage than Mrs B, certainly in terms of weight.   

Black-headed Gull on the wing.

Meditteranean Gull - From Carl's level of excitement

I think it is fairly rare sight in the UK.

Unfortunately  Carl's normally extensive trip notes

let me down as he did not mention what this bird

was, So while I can assure you that it is not an owl

(I know this because Mrs B was in the car)

all I am left with is :-

It has feathers  (tick)

Wings 2 (tick)

Legs 2 (tick)

I know it as a ‘Long Billed White Thing that is not an owl'

Turnstones - making laps around us. It was like being

at a race track.....

This swan looks like a bit of a drip....

This male Fallow Deer looked magnificent sitting

down, face on to us. It was only when he stood up

we realised how small he was. I'm sure he will grow

into a magnificent specimen.

For some reason while Mala is petrified

of small cats and dogs, she has no problem

with Deer. Something to do with her

maiden name....Just as well her family name

was not Shark or Mad-Hamster

"Hare today, gone tomorrow...."

Not exactly wild life but a  good example of what

The Beast can do with a 600mm F5.6 lens ....

Mrs B "What no owls?"

Mala, looking for that elusive eighth layer....

  

Carl holding court

This would have been so much better if there was a

great big fat otter in the middle staring back at us...

Don't know why but I still like it, it must be the shapes.

Bewick swans

It looks like they are on a field trip.....

I think we have this young Grey Seal's attention....

"Oooh, That tickles"

"Across a bit,

down a bit

Aaaaggghhhh

That's the spot"

  

The determined commuter

This little Sanderling reminds me of a determined commuter,

hands in pockets as he fights against  the traffic…

Craig looking a bit like an eco warrier

Daphne and Gerald sunning themselves on the beach

This is either a very persistent second hand

car salesman or a rather randy Pheasant on the pull....

“But madam you can get it in matching drab brown….”

Yes ladies and gentlemen it's that time of year...

Like something out of a Benny Hill sketch

and proof that sex sells.... 

I think I did capture one otter

but he looks board.....

I don't think Mrs B is going to like my

suggestion that we get up even earlier

next time to go otter spotting....

Next week

Mrs B's cat feeding bird feeding station has yet to produce its first victim customer, so I'm not sure if I will be able to bring any pictures of anything but uneaten (but I can assure very expensive) bird food for next week.