Sunday 15 May 2011

Blog of War round 2 & UK scandal

Blog of War – Round 2

The second round of the Blog of War and our 3 remaining contestants have been set the task of finding a small blog (less than 20 followers) and championing the hell out of it. The two contestants who manage to grow their chosen blog  (A blog’s growth is measured by the number of new followers it receives) go through to the final.

Please remember not to follow any of the featured blogs until all three entries have been posted and you have read all the entries. It was disappointing in the 1st round that a number of votes were cast before all the entries had even been loaded..... Either there are a number of clairvoyant readers out there or a bit of over-enthusiastic supporting is going on…..

The entries in alphabetical order: -
1).  Lost.in.Idaho - Starts with 6* followers
2). Penwasser Place Starts with 14* followers
3). Suniverse I have no idea, as fitting with the whole messed up concept of this competition** “the Follow” section on the blog that Suniverse has chosen to champion appears to be corrupt – I will try and find out the starting figure ASAP …. We have to face the prospect that Suniverse may have disenfranchised herself and selected a blog that you can’t actually vote for….. or is this just a much more polite way of bowing out of a competition than not actually showing up….Less to follow*** shortly

* Looks like some peole started following before the competition had opened....again....

** I believe the key to my failure is glorious consistency. One day the entire debacle behind the Blog of War will be turned into a one of those really bad made for TV film, based on an unreadable long forgotten blog….

*** Sorry given the circumstances that may have been a rather insensitive word to use…
Back to the BlackLOG - latest UK scandal
The UK news is currently full of horror stories about how millions of the Great British public are about to have thousands of pounds unfairly charged to their Visa cards with no warning and no right of reply.   This sounds like an absolute disgrace - more examples of rip-off Britain.  We should be up in arms about this, writing to our MP’s and getting them to ask questions in the House of Commons.  Letters of righteous indignation to anyone who will publish…..  

It’s only when you delve a little further into the story that you find out that these poor innocent people, who are about to be charged thousands of pounds that they can’t afford, are actually not so innocent after all.  They went onto the 2012 Olympics web site and decided that in order to maximise their chances of getting tickets (tickets being allocated on a ballot basis for oversubscried events) they would over order. The site clearly states that if you put in for tickets you must have the funds to pay for them.

They are now starting to panic of course and have realised that the chickens might be coming home to roost.  Instead of taking responsibility for their own actions they are now moaning about the system, suddenly claiming that a ballot is not a fair way to decide the destination of the tickets….Oh yes, so having to ring a number, early one morning, along with millions of other people and not being able to get through because Hilda on the switchboard has gone for her  tea break, is a much better idea….      

What these whingers have done is lessened the chance of sensible people getting tickets….Mrs B (the official sensible half of the BlackLOG family) and I (putting on a temporary sensible hat for this occasion – it’s very nice but McG keeps attempting to eat the feathers) set ourselves a maximum limit for what tickets we wanted and have left it in the hands of the disorganisers (it's Britain, there is bound to be a cock-up of monumental proportions.  Useful if making a blue movie but not so good when you are a fairly prudish nation with aspirations of actually being great on the world stage….It is hard when you were once a headline act but are now lucky to make the 2pm slot on stage 7, out beyond the toilets….. ) .  If only moaning was an official Olympic sport the UK would be guaranteed a hatful of medals :-

100 metre moan
Short and explosive - the blue ribbon event of the vocal antagonistic games or is it just that the air is blue with unprintable expletives…

3 day ranting  
Not just hard on the contestants but the spectators as well, 72 hours of non-stop ranting. If you are unfortunate enough to get tickets  bring earplugs and a good book….

Whinge wrestling
The object of the event is to pin your opponent down with intensive whingeing.

Beach grumble
Contestants stand on either side of a net, wearing as little as possible.  Serving mild insults with dark mumblings being returned…   

Marathon whinge
This event can last for what seems like ever. The current world record stands at 4 years 3 months, 12 days, 2 hours, 13 minute, 12 seconds,13 seconds, 14 seconds  and is ongoing by Mrs Edith Baxter 24 seconds, 25 seconds, who really knows how to get a whinge on…. 37 second, 38, seconds

Snivel vaulting
Taking snivelling to new heights

Modern griping
No old fashioned event this one but full on contemporary griping

Protest walking
Similar to marching but higher pitched and faster, can include pitch forks and burning torches for a more old fashioned feel….

Table whimpering
Contestants stand either side of the table and take it in turns to whimper back and forth until one of the competitors breaks down and gets dragged off by big burly men in white and provided with a free straight jacket.   A really good result is where both competitors get dragged off….

The triple grouse
Tripled distilled grousing …..taking grousing to whole new levels ….or should that be depths…

Rowing
No not on a lake but in a pub, your living room, in the car, with your partner, your friends or neighbours.  The hardest one is solo rowing, where you have to argue with yourself…     

Now before you write this idea off as a BlackLOG whimsy, the Modern Olympics has in its time included such epeic events as:

Poetry

Town Planning - I’m guessing that Bishops Stortford never won any medals for this….Not unless there was a special category for “When did you last see your designer…?”

Poodle Clipping (1908 Olympics)

and  

Pottery…..They could rebrand it as “Harry Pottery” and put some much needed magic back into the Olympics ...
I’m not even kidding otherwise I would have included :-

"Formation Knitting"

and

"Dry Cracker Eating"

Although sadly those of you who followed the above "Poodle Clipping" link and read the article will have noted that Poodle Clipping was actually an April Fool’s Day article from the Daily Telegraph – I’m gutted…..On a brighter note the makers of QI (a BBC TV programme) fell for it hook line and sinker.  The other events were included up to the 1948 London Olympics –
So would Olympic verbal sparring really be so farfetched……?  Obviously in order to stop the French from having a huge advantage the nonchalant shoulder shrug would be declared an illegal move….
Icicle Works 30th anniversary
It was off to see the Icicle Works 30th anniversary tour last week and a good opportunity to catch up with my Best Man, Robert, who I‘ve not seen for a few years.  Great concert from one of my favourite bands (well, Ian McNabb’s non-solo vehicle) who had not lost any of their stagecraft…although they did play around with one of my favourite songs Birds Fly (Whisper to a scream)…. As Mrs B likes to say, “You should never mess with a good thing” (apparently this doesn’t apply to me).

I had a deja vu feeling, which I discovered was the Icicle Works drummer, for the evening, was none other than Mathew Priest – The very same drummer who played with Dodgy at last week’s Stortfest.   


Show me the sunny
Monitoring our way to a fortune (or not) with our Solar Panels

KW Produced so far – 1155

KW generated in the week – 117

This has earned us approximately – £563
Of which £175 has been paid out so far…

Record of the week

Birds Fly (whsiper to a scream) - by the Icicle works

Hollow Horse - By The Icicle works - A good representation of the Blog of War competition

Shout - by Lulu - As close as I could get to representing a verbal argument with out getting truly offensive and wheeling out The Proclaimers….Believe me I was tempted

Photo Finish
Birds are finally making there way into the garden – enough that McG and Mischief are getting some exercise (well their eyes at least and occasionally they even manage to move their heads….) so managed to get some shots with The Beast.


Unfortunately I could not get The Beast into the Icicle Works and his low light ability was sorely missed. So the Mega Mini Beast struggled and ultimately didn’t achieve much worthwhile.....

Collared Dove, not sure if it attempting a fan dance

or it has just over balanced reaching for food…

Roy Corkhill - Icicle  works bass (1988 - 2011)

Ian McNabb, lead singer and founder member
"Love is a Wonderful Colour" - Purple I guess..

 Hollow horse....

Do pop in next week for another slice of irrelevant rubbish…..

15 comments:

  1. ok, ok. I posted. Sorry for the delay. MASSIVE internet outage for my local ISP. Coffee shop #4 finally had a different provider, so I slapped something together using my girlfriend's hijacked laptop.

    Drama? I gots it.

    ReplyDelete
  2. The whole Blog of War thing has left me completely confused. Sorry not to be capable of even joining in to judge(?) nor entirely understanding if that's even possible. I'm too simple for my shirt, for sure. Was wondering about the alternative Olympics though, ad think I could qualify as a whinger. Where can I apply? If it's the same scheme as the Blog of War I'll never find the enrollment office...

    ReplyDelete
  3. Lost.in.Idaho said...
    ok, ok. I posted. Sorry for the delay. MASSIVE internet outage for my local ISP. Coffee shop #4 finally had a different provider, so I slapped something together using my girlfriend's hijacked laptopDrama? I gots it.
    .

    It goes with the history of the competition, thanks for persevering…This competition is truly jinxed, especially as Suniverse has selected a blog that no one can follow

    ReplyDelete
  4. skipperthewonderhorse said...
    The whole Blog of War thing has left me completely confused. Sorry not to be capable of even joining in to judge(?) nor entirely understanding if that's even possible. I'm too simple for my shirt, for sure. Was wondering about the alternative Olympics though, ad think I could qualify as a whinger. Where can I apply? If it's the same scheme as the Blog of War I'll never find the enrollment office...
    Don’t worry Olympic whinging is far easier than the Blog of War….I had not realised that getting people to follow a blog was going to turn out to be so complicated….for the final I might have to try something a bit simpler like getting people to count to 1 ….I won’t even make them do it backwards….

    ReplyDelete
  5. I'm liking the proposed Olympic events. Do the Summer Olympics have anything similar to curling? I don't feel like thinking about it too hard. If not, I don't think I have the skillz to qualify for anything, unless your events catch on. Just in case, I should start practicing now. Also, if dry cracker eating was an event, I would totally cheat to maximize my chances of securing a ticket.

    Just thought of something else, pottery would make a sweet event...if you could simply place a wad of clay on a pottery wheel, rev it up, and see how far the clay flies across the room. Kind of like the shot put, but without manly-looking women wearing spandex.

    ReplyDelete
  6. ok table whimpering really cracked me up for some reason!!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Brooke said

    I'm liking the proposed Olympic events. Do the Summer Olympics have anything similar to curling?
    The closest that I can think of is Shopping cart hurling….or is that one of my alternative events?

    I don't feel like thinking about it too hard. If not, I don't think I have the skillz to qualify for anything, unless your events catch on. Just in case, I should start practicing now.
    That is the most stupidest comment I have ever received, your mother is a hamster and your father smells of elderberries ….kidding, just getting some practice in for the insult hurling event….

    Also, if dry cracker eating was an event, I would totally cheat to maximize my chances of securing a ticket.
    I believe the only chances of getting to see what would be destined to be the most oversubscribed event in Olympic events (despite prices starting at a recommended £15,000) would be to enter the damn thing….

    Just thought of something else, pottery would make a sweet event...if you could simply place a wad of clay on a pottery wheel, rev it up, and see how far the clay flies across the room. Kind of like the shot put, but without manly-looking women wearing spandex.
    Happy with the concept….. except you have to keep the manly-looking women wearing spandex….

    ReplyDelete
  8. Krystal said...
    ok table whimpering really cracked me up for some reason!!
    So I can put you down as the Swiss entry for that one?

    ReplyDelete
  9. HEY!

    Don't blame me - blame those fucking wankers at WordPress who can't configure shit correctly.

    Also, I think I should get bonus points because the blog is so fucking awesome.

    XO,

    S

    ReplyDelete
  10. Also, nice choice with the Icicle Works. I feel the need for a diet Coke and a smoke.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Suniverse said...
    HEY!

    Don't blame me - blame those fucking wankers at WordPress who can't configure shit correctly.

    Also, I think I should get bonus points because the blog is so fucking awesome.

    XO,

    S

    I can certainly give you bonus points, millions of bonus points, bonus points until they are coming out of your ears and I agree you found a terrific blog…… Sadly, due to my misguided attempts to spice up the voting and sharing the love it is going to be an all male final….Sorry but at least you can go home with your head up high and hopefully given a great blog a bit of additional exposure….

    Also, nice choice with the Icicle Works. I feel the need for a diet Coke and a smoke.
    Am I missing a reference here???

    I’m glad that someone likes at least some of the music here, I’m still desperately trying to recover from the after affects of one of the comments over at L.i.I when the only mention of the BlackLOG from one of his devotees was how lame the music is….Ouch…talk about a low blow….

    ReplyDelete
  12. I'm new to blog wars, though I think it is a continuation from an earlier blog battle, right?

    I'm familiar with the very versatile and articulate Lost in Idaho. I enjoy him immensely.

    I also wanted to thank you for dropping in over at THE SNEE and leaving the fun comment. I enjoy blog repartee!

    ReplyDelete
  13. Niel, Niel....my sincerest apologies for not being around lately, esp. to read this latest post. I will undoubtedly slap myself on the wrist.

    I can't believe that many people actually attempted to order that many tickets with insufficient funds. I guess huge on the olympics is an understatement.

    At first I was baffled, but then it turned into one of those stories of a humorous, chaotic nature.

    "As Mrs B likes to say, “You should never mess with a good thing” I love that Mrs. B a little more each time I read this blog.

    And as usual, those are really, really great photos!

    I do plan to be up & running again on Monday & have a post lined up, so you'll definitely be seeing me around a lot more.

    I hope you & the Mrs. are having a most splendid weekend! =)

    ReplyDelete
  14. THE SNEE said...
    I'm new to blog wars, though I think it is a continuation from an earlier blog battle, right?
    It’s the bastard son of a competition that I entered which stopped, started, stopped, started etc…etc…I got so fed up that I decided to run a competition that would not let any people who entered down, so while it never really took off, I can’t kill it off….It will however be over soon and I can get back to a normal none competitive blogging

    I'm familiar with the very versatile and articulate Lost in Idaho. I enjoy him immensely.
    I certainly can’t argue with that assessment

    I also wanted to thank you for dropping in over at THE SNEE and leaving the fun comment. I enjoy blog repartee!
    The repartee is one of the best things about blogging….

    ReplyDelete
  15. LilPixi said...
    Niel, Niel....my sincerest apologies for not being around lately, esp. to read this latest post. I will undoubtedly slap myself on the wrist.
    No need to apologies, there is no contractual obligation for you or anyone to read the BlackLOG…just my hope that I can make it entertaining enough to keep people tuning in….

    I can't believe that many people actually attempted to order that many tickets with insufficient funds. I guess huge on the olympics is an understatement.
    It never fails to impress me the stupidity of people and the risks they will take to try and get a competitive advantage….

    At first I was baffled, but then it turned into one of those stories of a humorous, chaotic nature.
    Such is the way I seem lead my life…

    "As Mrs B likes to say, “You should never mess with a good thing” I love that Mrs. B a little more each time I read this blog.
    The mild mannered Mrs B has actually got a wicked sense of humour….

    And as usual, those are really, really great photos!
    I have to commend you on your great eyesight and exquisite taste…

    I do plan to be up & running again on Monday & have a post lined up, so you'll definitely be seeing me around a lot more.
    I should hope so…

    I hope you & the Mrs. are having a most splendid weekend! =)
    As ever all too short….

    ReplyDelete

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