Tuesday 6 March 2012

Sayonara – or possibly Bloodynora


This weeks BlackLOG covers :-
 - The build upto our Japan trip
 - Kaiser Chiefs at Hammersmith Apollo
 - My entries for "The Veolia environment Wildlife Photographer of the Year - 2012"

Sayonara – or possibly Bloodynora
With our Japan trip only 8 months away I felt it was time to get into the swing of things so sent Mrs B the following email:

“Mrs B do you fancy getting in the mood for Japan?  I can book a table at Roka Restaurant in Canary Wharf.”

This lead to the following exchange:


はい!そこが、高価で素晴らしいことだ。

Love you, Mrs B”

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Dear clever clogs.  My rough grasp of Japanese (said in a loud voice , with accent and slanty eyes *) comes up with: 

It is! There, being expensive, it is splendid thing” **

Which could be a “yes” or “good idea but no, I have spent all my bonus on handbags and all things red***
So do you want me to :-

A) – Book a table (and for what time)

B) – Contact the bank for an overdraft to get us through to next month

C) – Book you into “RA” Red Anonymous – “Hi my name is Mrs B and I can’t stop buying red things....”

Sayonara – or possibly Bloodynora if you chuck anymore Japanese at me....

Love Me”

* Yes, I'm afraid I'm one of those Brits.  While I can fluently fail to speak other languages (some would even say I struggle with English), it  does not prevent me from gamely attempting to converse at a very loud level, in English with a strange accents.  The accent used may or may not bare resemblance to the language of the poor unfortunate, often bewildered, individuals that is the recipient of my attempts to break down the language barrier. This drives Mrs B up the wall, secretly I think she is jealous of my special talent...

** You have to love Babel Fish as a translator

*** While Pablo Picasso went through a blue period (1901 – 1904) and Van Gogh went through a yellow period, Mrs B is currently going through a red period – handbags, shoes, kitchen utensils etc are morphing towards red .....I just hope we can stop our bank account going that way....

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We made it to Roka.  It was fascinating – expensively authentic, so really getting us into training for Japan.

The staff were quite rude and dismissive – which made me feel a bit like being one of the prisoners on Bridge over the River Kwai

Mrs B was running a bit late (more British rail than Swiss clockwork) and I was sat next to a Japanese woman eating on her own.  I watched with fascination as she ate and texted at the same time (I know there is a phenomenon “sexting”, I wondered if this was an example of being  “texfed”).  If it was me I would probably end up tapping a little rice messages while munching down on my iphone...

It turns out the Japanese diner wasn’t on her own and her date turned up about half an hour later.  She briefly stopped eating, stretched out a hand in his general direction but did not manage to look up from her phone...

I have noticed that more and more people don’t appear to be able to function without a smart phone in hand – while walking, talking, driving and, although I might not have witnessed it, probably sex as well – let’s face it there is bound to be an app for it....

There was no apparent conversation from the other table but plenty of texting. So I guess they were communicating just not sure if it was with each other....While the future of the virtual world seems secure I’m a bit concerned  about the prospect of actual social interaction.....

I’m delighted to announce that we both managed to survive our Japanese culinary experience – Mrs B managing to avoid raw fish, while I avoided vegetables both raw and cooked (It’s all about vegetable rights ....honest he says, with fingers crossed behind his back). Although I’m not sure how much of a dry run this really was - sitting in a restaurant with English menus and surrounded by English speaking waiters and waitresses is not much of a test for finding ourselves in a restaurant with no English menus and non-English speaking staff....

Kaiser Chiefs
The Kaiser Chiefs made it, the support band made it, I made it, my friend Ediane made it, her husband Costas made it (but not to the support).  Unfortunately Mrs B and The Beast didn’t make it.  Mrs B got caught up in another work crisis, while The Beast didn’t get an invite, being too big to sneak in, and he was replaced by the Mega Mini Beast. 

The Kaiser Chiefs and support (Frankie And The Heartstrings, Fixers) were great.
Ediane and Costas really enjoyed it.
I really missed Mrs B and the Beast  - concerts are never the same when they don’t make it.
Ricky Lead singer takes to the balcony for
a well earned rest between songs

At least the drums were in focus....

Costas and Ediane - The low light ability of
the Mega Mini Beast could give a burnt out
light bulb a run for its money....

Watch of the Week
The regular section in support of Joe (Stunt Cock) and his growing watch business Xupes. Joe mentioned that they had been getting a number of hits via the BlackLOG.

Xupes has been trading for over 2 years and  Joe has recently developed some great contacts in the trade which enables him to pick up surplus stock and sell them at great prices. Mrs B is a regular purchaser from his jewellery section, going self service once she finally realised that her husband is not the jewellery buying type…


Must de Cartier 21 SS 18K
Must de Cartier 21 SS 18K
Price £1,095
RRP £2,100
Saving £1,005
Click on the watch to find out more  

Record of the Week


I Think I'm turning Japanese by The Vapours – Not if my dodgy accent has anything to do with it 

Communication Breakdown by Led Zeppelin – Certianly the face to face variety

Never Miss A Beat by Kaiser Chiefs – Mrs B did...she missed all of them...
   
Photo Finish  
I’ve entered a little photo competition,  The Veolia environment Wildlife Photographer of the Year for 2012 – I don’t for one minute expect to win any of the categories, let alone the big one (overall winner) but I would like at least one of my pictures to be selected,  blown up to huge oversized proportions and hung alongside the work of some much-respected professional wildlife photographers as an exhibit at the Natural History Museum....I won’t get to find out if any of my pictures make it till later in the year – so wish me luck. In the meantime here are my handcrafted entries: - 
The Wildlife Photojournalist Award
This category seeks to develop the visual narrative through a series of six (6) unique images that, together, tell a story without the need for words.

When nature comes to you - I looked out of the window one night and saw this beautiful fox walking about like a tourist. I grabbed the camera and shot out of the front door.  I was at first disappointed that the street light had given all the shots an amber glow but came to realise it is actually part of the charm of the picture. 

The suburban tourist 1 of 6  - I wish I had studied road signs as a cub

The suburban tourist 2 of 6 - Asking Directions

The suburban tourist 3 of 6 - People Watching

What better tourist occupation than People watching?

The suburban tourist 4 of 6 -  Nature Walk

The suburban tourist 5 of 6 - Shoe Shopping

Unusually chew ability scored higher over size,
colour and style for this savvy shoe shopper

The suburban tourist 6 of 6 - Recreational drug taking

Sad to see that drugs seem to be invading
all aspects of modern life.
Category - Creative Visions
This category is for conceptual pictures – original and surprising views of nature, whether figurative or abstract

The small water god
 
Animal Portraits 
This Red Kyte looked so majestic hovering
in the air, waiting to swoop down.

Lioness - Domination

I love the way this lioness dominates the picture - she just owns
her environment, walking straight towards the camera - You just
know you are in her world and playing by her rules....


Fox in the Snow

No more than a few meters from our front door this beautiful Fox appeared –
Looking very much at home. I talked to some passing dog walkers who said
he was a regular visitor and they would often find him sitting just a few feet
away from them watching them and their pet.  They described it more like
 a guardian angel than a wild predator.... 
 Animals in their Environment
Spotted Fly Catcher...

Southern Boubou in flight

When on safari it is easy to concentrate on just the traditional game –
Having already seen: lion; elephant; giraffe;  cheetah; rhino etc  I
was looking around to see if anything else was going on and a
Southern Boubou caught my eye,  perched on a bush. I brought my
camera around to take what I thought would be a static shot, just as
the Boubou  took flight and so managed to track the bird for a more
interesting shot.
Behaviour: Mammals
Tempting as it was I decided not to play fetch...

After a couple of days watching lions lazing around, barely moving,  it was
fascinating and rewarding to be able to watch this young lioness, around
2 years old. The way she played with the stick was like watching a family
 pet,  her tongue poking out taunting us for not getting out of the truck 
and coming over to play with her....  

 Elephant - Thou Shall Not Pass

We were returning to the lodge for dinner one night when we came
 across this male Elephant.  He was in a bad mood and decided that no
one was going to get passed.  After a 20 minute standoff he decided
 enough was enough and decided to charge.  Our Ranger threw the
 truck into reverse and felt it would be best to take the long route home....
Behaviour: Birds
Sparrow - Reflections of flight
 
Next week we continue the kitchen revamp - How well do you think it's going?



20 comments:

  1. This post is filled with lines that made me laugh. My three favorites:

    "(said in a loud voice , with accent and slanty eyes *)"

    "I just hope we can stop our bank account going that way...."

    "probably sex as well – let’s face it there is bound to be an app for it..." (I bet there is, I'll do some research and write another one of my iPhone app reviews on it.......wait.....that's inappropriate.)

    ReplyDelete
  2. bootiful photos. You deserve a win. Want you to tell Mrs B that I saw a hawk trying to kill a barn owl on the grass verge this morning at 7am. I scared off the wretched hawk (sparrowhawk or similar) and waited for the poor barn owl to shake out its feathers, take a deep breath and flap off in a wobbling path to a nearby tree to assess its own health after the attack. MrsB would have loved it!

    ReplyDelete
  3. My boyfriend is teaching himself Japanese by listening to language CDs in the car. Me, I like English, I'm working on becoming a master of the language. maybe one day I'll pick up Spanish again, but foreign languages are not my strong suit. The accents I make up to accommodate the languages are pretty hilarious.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I think Van Gogh's "yellow" period can be attributed to when he pissed his pants after cutting his ear off.
    By the way, interesting how you speak of a "yellow" period in the same blog as a description of your trip to Japan.
    Which, in keeping with that train of thought, I must say to you: "Good ruck, round eye."

    ReplyDelete
  5. Great pictures there, the lioness and elephant are brilliant. I hope you've got them in picture frames in your house.

    ReplyDelete
  6. If my experience with good Japanese food is anything to go by, I suggest the chat with the bank manager might be a good idea.

    Amazing photos. Love the fox series and the bird over the fence, just stunning

    “Lizard Happy”

    ReplyDelete
  7. L-Kat said...
    This post is filled with lines that made me laugh. My three favorites:

    "(said in a loud voice , with accent and slanty eyes *)"

    "I just hope we can stop our bank account going that way...."

    "probably sex as well – let’s face it there is bound to be an app for it..." (I bet there is, I'll do some research and write another one of my iPhone app reviews on it.......wait.....that's inappropriate.)

    I’m so proud it’s like seeing my children praised.....although now that I’ve started to think of them as children I’m rapidly going off them...thanks for being such a great and supportive fellow blogger...

    ReplyDelete
  8. skipperthewonderhorse said...
    bootiful photos. You deserve a win.
    Thank you Teach, can we get you on the judging panel?

    Want you to tell Mrs B that I saw a hawk trying to kill a barn owl on the grass verge this morning at 7am. I scared off the wretched hawk (sparrowhawk or similar) and waited for the poor barn owl to shake out its feathers, take a deep breath and flap off in a wobbling path to a nearby tree to assess its own health after the attack. MrsB would have loved it!
    While Mrs B is annoyed with your local Owl population for playing hide and hide some more, I’m confident that she doesn’t want to have them maimed in order to see one in the Feather.... P.S. Where is the artist sketch or quick water colour?...don’t you carry around your brush and paper to capture these events...

    ReplyDelete
  9. the Tsaritsa said...
    My boyfriend is teaching himself Japanese by listening to language CDs in the car.
    I’m planning to teach myself fluent car speak by listening to car engine noises when I’m in Japan

    Me, I like English, I'm working on becoming a master of the language. maybe one day I'll pick up Spanish again, but foreign languages are not my strong suit.
    I know what you mean...my string suit is probably clubs....

    The accents I make up to accommodate the languages are pretty hilarious.
    We will have to get together and compare our worse efforts

    ReplyDelete
  10. Al Penwasser said...
    I think Van Gogh's "yellow" period can be attributed to when he pissed his pants after cutting his ear off.
    Wasn’t that his red period.... Perhaps they overlapped

    By the way, interesting how you speak of a "yellow" period in the same blog as a description of your trip to Japan.
    Which, in keeping with that train of thought, I must say to you: "Good ruck, round eye."

    Oh yes, yet another entire nation who are feeling exploited and insulted by the BlackLOG.....

    ReplyDelete
  11. cynicalscribble said...
    Great pictures there, the lioness and elephant are brilliant. I hope you've got them in picture frames in your house.
    I’m waiting until they get accepted into the Wild life competition and are printed and put on the walls of the Natural History Machine – at which point I’m going to sneak in, nick them, take them home and put them on the walls....

    ReplyDelete
  12. Mynx said...
    If my experience with good Japanese food is anything to go by, I suggest the chat with the bank manager might be a good idea.
    I’ve put my bank manager on speed dial.....

    Amazing photos. Love the fox series and the bird over the fence, just stunning
    Thank You

    ReplyDelete
  13. I do the accent thing too. I was at a German restaurant with a group of friends a few weekends ago, and another friend and I decided to pull out our limited German (mixed with English) to annoy everyone else. It didn't help that the place was called "Wunder Bar".

    Your photos are really great. Good luck!!!

    ReplyDelete
  14. As has already been established, you've got an excellent backlog of nature photos, and captions or not, I wish you the best of luck with the competition. Also, it's good to see you're getting a nice headstart on the Japan trip. Only eight months left in which to start packing bags? One can never be over-prepared for traveling.

    And a nice musical selection this week inspired by the wife. It took a few listen-throughs, but the new CD is finally growing on me.

    Cheers!

    ReplyDelete
  15. I love the Lioness too! She's so badass.

    And I loved your email to Mrs. B. Very funny.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Brooke said...
    I do the accent thing too. I was at a German restaurant with a group of friends a few weekends ago, and another friend and I decided to pull out our limited German (mixed with English) to annoy everyone else. It didn't help that the place was called "Wunder Bar".
    With a name like Wunder Bar you had no choice but to speak with a mock Germanic accent....

    Your photos are really great. Good luck!!!
    Having seen this year’s entries for the competition I fear they are not good enough to make it to the final snap off

    ReplyDelete
  17. A Beer for the Shower said...
    As has already been established, you've got an excellent backlog of nature photos, and captions or not, I wish you the best of luck with the competition. Also, it's good to see you're getting a nice head start on the Japan trip. Only eight months left in which to start packing bags? One can never be over-prepared for travelling.
    I’m not sure 8 months is going to be enough.....sadly I fear the competition is probably a bit serious for my attempts at humour....Still I might get lucky and what with the wide world recession they might be looking for something a bit more light hearted.

    And a nice musical selection this week inspired by the wife. It took a few listen-throughs, but the new CD is finally growing on me.

    Cheers!

    Grower songs and albums are much better than the catchy ones that you like straight away but get bored with pretty quickly...

    ReplyDelete
  18. Miss Caitlin S. said...
    I love the Lioness too! She's so badass.
    I certainly would not mess with her....

    And I loved your email to Mrs. B. Very funny.
    Thank you – just as well Mrs B shares my sense of humour, I guess after 27 years she must be more than used to it...

    ReplyDelete
  19. Hey there BlackLOG - How are you?
    I feel like it's been ages...so, first off, do you actually own all the watches you features? One is nicer than the next.

    Tell Mrs. B...I'm all for the red! Does she add lipstick to that list?

    And the photos are spectacular - truly amazing. You really are gifted with the Beast!

    Have a wonderful week. I've been keeping busy with co-hosting duties and after weeks of not surfacing in the commenting department I thought I'd surprise you!

    Cheers, Jenny @ PEARSON REPORT

    ReplyDelete
  20. Pearson Report said...
    Hey there BlackLOG - How are you?
    Very well, although life has kept me away from blogging duties – thus the tardy response to your comment...sorry....


    I feel like it's been ages...so, first off, do you actually own all the watches you features? One is nicer than the next.
    No I own none of them – A good friend has a business so I said I would feature his watches in return for ...well nothing really ..... I guess I don’t have a head for business

    Tell Mrs. B...I'm all for the red! Does she add lipstick to that list?
    Probably, although with my attention span I could not really say – This is the man who can pick Mrs B up from the hairdressers and forget to mention her new sytle....

    And the photos are spectacular - truly amazing. You really are gifted with the Beast!
    Certainly the Beast is, I just go along for the freeride....

    Have a wonderful week. I've been keeping busy with co-hosting duties and after weeks of not surfacing in the commenting department I thought I'd surprise you!
    It’s always nice to get a surprise....hope all is going well with the competition. As I told you before, I’m still suffering the trauma of my own failed attempts to host a competition to even venture near yet alone enter....

    ReplyDelete

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